mixtape

You'll never make me leave
I wear this on my sleeve
Give me a reason to believe

So give me all your poison
And give me all your pills
And give me all your hopeless hearts
And make me ill
You're running after something
That you'll never kill
If this is what you want
Then fire at will

Preach all you want, but who's gonna save me?
I keep a gun on the book you gave me,
(Hallelujah, lock and load)

- My Chemical Romance, Thanks For The Venom


Hold on to what you need
We've got a knack for fucked up history
Hold on to what you need
We've got a knack for messed up history

Well we went downtown and we sat in the rain
Well looking what direction and waiting for a train and thought over
Its all overI did't know you kept track

I didn't know there was a score
Well it looks like your the winner and
I aint gonna play no more
Its over
Game over

Well we walked real stiff and i came inside the ground
You hit me with yours
And said 'pull yourself together'Its overOh it's over

You can say what you want but don't act like you care
It takes more than one person to decide whats fair
Its over
Think it over

You were spitting venom at most everyone you know
If the damned gave you a road map then you'd know which way to go

- Modest Mouse, Spitting Venom


i can understand now why people would cut themselve. not little emo kids who cut themselves and then tape it up, wear wristbands so all their little punk emo friends will know they are so hardcore. but the ones who cut themselves and let it bleed out, deep gashes visible all the time that never relly heal, leaving bloody handprints on refridgerator doors when opening it to make the orange juice. not the 'heart on your sleeve' bullshit symbolism, but a sign that yes, i am a human being. look what happens when i get hurt. why should i bother to hide my pain, hold it in? shouldn't you have to bear it too? if i have to suffer, then you should at least have to clean up the mess that you have made out of me. literally. maybe it is from bringing christine into the house again, and then just as quickly having her leave. maybe it is from the terrible words that you hurl at me, blaming it on your anger but there has to be a root to those feelings. maybe it is because of the way you regard my relationship. or maybe it is because of the way you see me

i'm only as much of a mess as you make me.